Notes to Self
Index-Card-a-Day posts have unintentionally dominated my blog this summer so as promised, I'm beginning a review of recent journal pages. My journaling has gone through definite stages in terms of content. When I was in the midst of all the drama and surgical trauma surrounding my hands & feet, I journaled a lot about overcoming obstacles to make my way back to art. I spent many, many pages talking myself through the seemingly endless years of physical therapy. I poured my heart out about depression and anxiety, simultaneously unloading and uplifting myself. I use my journals as sounding board whenever I needed to talk things out and think things through.
Lately, as my health stabilizes in some areas, I've turned my journaing towards two main mental conversations: self-care and building an art career. Sometimes those two goals are diametrically opposed: sustaining any gains in my health battles really requires slowing down and learning not to push myself so hard. In contrast, sustaining any momentum towards self-employment requires a certain "never give up, never surrender" approach. So, in my journals, I converse with myself in words and images about these topics, recording inspiring quotes, issuing commandments, roughing out ideas for art show material, and recording pep talks to be read when things feel bleak.
I'm not sure if I've gained any clarity on either issue but I've definitely built up my courage for both battles. Journals are a wonderous tool!