Monday, June 8, 2009

Learning to Find My Way

Here I am, way back when, transposed onto a wintery landscape of indecision and uncertainity. The little one steps hestitantly but hopefully, ready to face and embrace whatever the world may throw across her path. Fast forward nearly 40 years (yes, the big 4-0 is coming) and some days, maybe many more than I would like, I've lost that little girl, so bold in her red smock, so focused on the next step, so delighted by the smallest detail beneath her feet. And some days...oh, how I treasure those days...I am that child again, confident no matter how big the life around her but still exploring, still wondering and wandering, one step at a time. My art life is in flux right now as I try desperately to settle on five separate themes for my upcoming shows beginning in September. After the last wrist surgery, I dabbled in a little bit of everything, testing out my new anatomy, retraining it to help me do what I love. Now, over 14 months later, I'm finding it hard to focus on any one thing for any length of time. I discovered...*gasp!*...that I love playing, taste-testing, wandering in and out of materials and methods. The real world needs me to find my focus, to have unifying ideas and uniform execution, to already know the path, rather than looking completely lost. I feel the pressure of time in the studio slipping away as spring slides into summer. Fall will be here I before I know it. I do, indeed, have miles to go before I sleep.

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